In a momentous fusion folly, MIT sleuths just set a record for nuclear plasma stability, giving our future energy prospects a cheeky, radiation-free wink! Cheers to science!
“In an unexpectedly steady corporate romance, AMD and OpenAI are at it again. A chess move clever enough to impress Deep Blue!”
“Wired.com’s playful take: OpenAI’s ChatGPT is an imaginative, artificial pal with a talent for maintaining complex conversations. Broadcasting without ‘robotic’ characteristics, it’s the childhood friend you always wanted.”
“Move over, chess-playing AI. Machine learning is now brewing cocktails of bacterial paralysis, possibly revolutionising antibiotics. Grumbles from old-school scientists heard in the background! Kudos to those MIT nerds!”
Taking a leap from 1 to 5 petaflops, MIT’s computing upgrade displays a prowess that would make any rabbit blush. University-based supercomputers, meet your alpha.
Brace yourselves as Musk-led OpenAI pushes the frontier, shaping AI into a ‘smiling’, ‘blinking’ actor who even dreams of free pizza wheels have trouble outsmarting.
“Thinking Machines Labs isn’t making PBS reruns but supercomputing for the business world, with fine-tuned AI machines that are as groundbreaking as a reheated lunch.”
“Chatbots may wrestle with subtlety and lack human empathy, but bless their coding hearts, they don’t need sleep or breaks! Still, actual human chat? Not quite.”
From spinal cord aids to plaything of tech startups, neural interfaces are going mainstream. OpenAI’s audacious plan: turn your brainwaves into your personal Apple Vision Pro remote.
“Google, not content with mere I/O architecture, now trains AI to smell out ransomware. It’s a truffle pig in the digital forest, though some ‘shrooms may still elude it.”
