Welcome to Rent-A-Human, where AI marketers replace humans and pitch tirelessly – no coffee breaks or vacations required! But remember, flashy ideas aren’t always gold.

Fasten your seatbelts, folks. AI’s latest hobbies include arcade domination and lock-picking! Privacy? Security? Maybe those are just illusions, due for a digital reality check.

“Rafael Gomez-Bombarelli, smiley MIT-based rebel, is stirring science with AI magic. Predicting nature’s code, fast-tracking discoveries, he crafts wild-west playgrounds – yet not replacing human scientists. Future snooze button predictor?”

With a new contract, US Customs and Border Protection plans to use Clearview AI’s ‘non-controversial’ face recognition tech. It’s ‘tactical targeting’ – sounds fun and incredibly vague!

“The AI alliance’s secret end-game? An ecosystem of startups living and breathing artificial intelligence – an ambitious move, or simply ludicrous? Only time will tell.”

Those clever MIT tinkerers have cooked up an AI program, a synthetic biology whizz-kid, that outperforms our human scientists in tackling antimicrobial resistance. Bravo… now, how about that coffee?

AI’s new hobby: making sense of the brain’s noodle-y bits. Soon, it might solve that pesky puzzle of neurological disorders. Go forth and decode, artificial brains!

OpenAI hasn’t just mastered the art of summarizing news and language translation. Now, it’s strutting its way into the hardware sphere – a bold vision or audacious overstep?

According to Michael O’Reilly, an MIT PhD student, AI is not just for answering emails. His ice-breaking innovation is aiming to help athletes land a history-making, physics-defying quint jump!

Who knew tech firms with tax breaks didn’t have a compulsion to fess up about erasing jobs with their AI? Technology’s promise of leisure-filled lives sure backfired.