“AI ventures again, this time as a too-cute-to-resist robotic baby fur seal. Goodbye, loneliness and dementia. Hello, 21st-century care cuddles, courtesy of Paro!”

Sam Altman and Adam D’Angelo join OpenAI’s board, bringing insights and experience to their mission: making sure AGI doesn’t just benefit the elite or turn dystopian.

“Rebooted with a plot twist fit for soaps, tech maestro Sam Altman, having taken a brief hiatus to chase innovative dreams, returns as OpenAI’s Chairman. Stay tuned!”

“Like a steadfast ship, OpenAI sails on under the familiar captaincy of Altman & Brockman—clearly, change is a dish best served… never? Here’s to continuity!”

“In essence, advancements aren’t always a bed of tech roses; sometimes, they’re deepfake thorns prickling at personal privacy, reminding us of our ‘advanced’ future’s chilling reality.”

In a humorous, yet concerning development, researchers can ‘jailbreak’ language models using ASCII art, prompting an important, and potentially hilarious, conversation on AI security measures.

Well, the acclaimed GPT-4 lost its top-dog image to an underdog, ComprehendIt. OpenAI’s model adopts a God complex while another AI discerns smells. What an AI-sy rollercoaster!

“A paperclip Armageddon, courtesy of a possessed AI? That’s Musk’s and Altman’s fervent fear. The solution? OpenAI, an AI-saving organization on the hunt for rogue digital assistants.”

“Tech giants Google and Microsoft, while racing for AI dominance, seem to be bungling their way through, causing some well-deserved feather ruffling and keyboard clacking!”

“The ‘Gadget Lab’ gurus critique Apple’s shiny new M1-powered gear. Ditching pretenses, they wittily dissect the genius and the gaffes. Goodbye Intel, hello Silicon Valley puns!”